Alright, listen up, y’all. We gonna talk about this… uh… fantasy football thing. My grandson, he keeps jabberin’ on about it. Says it’s important for his “2010 fantasy football rankings” or somethin’. Don’t ask me what that means, sounds like a bunch of hooey to me, but he says it helps him win money, so I guess it can’t be all bad.
So, first things first, they got these players, see? Like, uh… Adrian Peterson. That boy, he runs fast, real fast. My grandson says he’s number one. Number one! Means he’s the best, I reckon. Then there’s this Chris Johnson fella. He’s quick too. And Maurice Jones-Drew. Don’t know why they got such fancy names, but they must be good if they’re up there at the top.
Now, they got all these positions, like “RB.” That’s running back, I think. They run with the ball. Then there’s… well, I don’t rightly remember all of ’em. Too many for this old brain. But my grandson, he’s got it all figured out. He’s got these “cheat sheets,” he calls ’em. Lists of all the players, and how good they are supposed to be. He says it helps him pick the best team.
He’s always lookin’ at these things on his computer. Talkin’ about “mock drafts” and “scoring potential.” Landsakes, the words these young folks use! But he says it helps him practice, so he don’t mess up when it’s time for the real thing. He says he’s gotta look at how those fellas did in the past to know how good they’ll be in the games to come.
- Adrian Peterson: He’s the best, I tell ya.
- Chris Johnson: Fast as a whippet, this one.
- Maurice Jones-Drew: Another one of them speedy fellas.
- Michael Turner: He’s strong, like a bull.
- Frank Gore: Don’t know much about him, but he must be good to be on the list.
Seems like there’s always somethin’ changin’. One day, this player is good, the next day, he’s hurt. Like this Ben Tate fella, or Fred Jackson, or… uh… Marshawn Lynch. My grandson, he gets all worked up when that happens. Says it messes up his whole plan. He’s gotta change his whole strategy when one of those boys can’t run no more. Says some fellas like Brandon Jacobs and Knowshon Moreno ain’t doin’ so hot no more neither. Guess they’re gettin’ old, like me.
They got these numbers too, these “rankings.” Like a score, I guess. Goes all the way up to a thousand. My grandson says the higher the number, the better you’re doin’. He’s always checkin’ his score, seein’ if he’s better than his buddies. Boys will be boys, I guess, always gotta be competin’.
And then there’s the talk about who’s gonna score the most “points.” I still don’t quite get it, but it seems like some players are better at gettin’ those points than others. They gotta catch the ball, run with the ball, and I guess, do it better than the other fellas. My grandson, he spends hours lookin’ at these things, tryin’ to figure out who’s gonna be the best. He even looks at those funny team names they give each team, but I don’t pay no mind to that.
So, that’s about all I know about this fantasy football stuff. It’s a whole lot of numbers and names and talk about who’s the best. But if it makes my grandson happy, and maybe puts a little extra cash in his pocket, then I guess it’s alright. Just don’t ask me to explain it again, my head’s already spinnin’.
Anyway, this is what I’ve pieced together from all that jabberin’. Hope it makes some sense to you youngsters. And if you’re playin’ this fantasy football, good luck to ya. Just remember, it’s all just a game, ain’t no need to get too worked up about it.
This year, 2010, is gonna be a big one for these fantasy football fellas, my grandson says so. So you best listen up and pick your team wisely. And that’s all I got to say about that.
Tags: [Fantasy Football, 2010, Player Rankings, RB, Adrian Peterson, Chris Johnson, Maurice Jones-Drew, Cheat Sheet, Draft, Scoring]
