Well, howdy there! Let’s talk about this F1 thingamajig, the one that’s gonna shut down some roads. They call it “f1 strip closures,” sounds fancy, but it just means you can’t go the way you used to, you hear?
First off, they got these maps, see? Maps to show you how to get around. They say it’s new this year, so maybe last year folks got lost, who knows? They got maps for all them big hotels, like that Venetian place, the fancy one with the boats inside. If you gotta get to work, you gotta look at these maps, or you’ll be driving around like a chicken with its head cut off.
- They say you can get texts, too.
- Text some letters and numbers, F1LV to 31996, they say.
- Then they send you messages, tell you what roads is closed.
Now, about gettin’ around, they got this train thing, a monorail, they call it. It goes up high, like a rollercoaster, but slow. They say it’s the best way to get up and down the Strip when them race cars is zoomin’ around. Gonna be a mess of cars otherwise, they say. Traffic gonna be crazier than a goose in a hailstorm. They run all the time, every few minutes, so you ain’t gotta wait too long.
This whole thing, this race, they do it early in the morning, like when the roosters crow. Why? So folks over in Europe can watch it with their coffee, they say. That lady, Renee Wilm, she’s the boss of this whole shebang, she said so. We watch their races late at night, they watch ours early in the mornin’, seems fair, I guess.
They’re gonna close down a bunch of roads, you know. That big ol’ Las Vegas Boulevard, that’s gonna be partly closed. Koval Lane, Harmon Avenue, Sands Avenue, all them places. Koval Lane, that’s gonna be shut down tight for a whole week and more, from November 16th to the 25th. If you need to get on Koval Lane, you gotta go all the way around to Flamingo Road, like a big ol’ detour. They say it’s 17 turns, this track, second longest one they got. Those cars go fast, real fast, like a jackrabbit on a hot skillet. 240 kilometers per hour, whatever that is in real miles, I don’t know.
So, if you gotta go anywhere near the Strip during that time, you better plan ahead. Look at them maps, get them text messages, or just stay home and watch it on TV. It’s gonna be a whole heap of trouble, but I reckon some folks like watchin’ them cars go fast. Me? I’d rather watch paint dry. But hey, to each their own, right?
And don’t forget, they gonna be buildin’ this thing and then takin’ it all down, so it ain’t just the race days you gotta worry about. It’s gonna be a mess for a while, so be patient, y’all. And for goodness sake, don’t get lost! Use them maps, they ain’t just for decoration, ya hear?
Just remember, plan ahead, use the monorail if you can, and don’t be surprised if it takes you longer to get where you’re going. It’s gonna be a bit of a bother, but it’ll be over soon enough, and then things will get back to normal, whatever normal is in this crazy town.
Tags: [F1, Las Vegas, Strip Closures, Traffic, Road Closures, Travel, Monorail, Detours, Maps, November]
